Have you ever noticed how the words "think" and "stink" are so close in so many ways yet so different? When you think, for the most part, it's a useless pile of steaming Kangaroo feces just waiting to be disposed of. Basically, to be blunt, most thoughts are largely worthless and self serving. Now contemplate the meaning of "stink". Armpits stink, poop stinks, and I would imagine that hiking the Grand Canyon, in August, in a neoprene jogging suit would add some "pause to the cause" if I was hitch-hiking to Vermont and jumped into the back of some yuppie- do-gooder's Audi and rolled the windows up (not that anyone without a sunroof would risk trying to stuff my giant moon-head in their car). Both of these scenarios are self serving and pointless. Therefore I now declare that they MEAN THE SAME THING. They are synonymous. Therefore I am "thinking up" that poor mans Audi with my "thinky" Canyon sweat, and I am "stinking up" ways to "think up" my brothers car permanently so he'll have to replace the upholstery. Thinky meany the stinky and stinky meany the thinky....live it, learn it, love it. Stink before you act. Boo- yah.
Oh......my friggen noggin is a Saturn-like monstrosity.
Saturday, May 30, 2009
Sunday, May 24, 2009
Word of the day: Interesting
Interesting. This is the word of the day my precious's. I like to say it like this: Eeen-tur-res-teeng Kinda like that little Chihuahua whose name escapes me at the moment. Yes, VERY interesting, chihuahua's that is. Little ugly turds on legs they are. Hey! You could say "little" with the same accent and emphasis and throw "interesting" on the end of it: Lee-tool Eeen-tur-res-teeng. I think I've just invented a new language......wait...it's still English. Curses! That bloody language is so hard to learn and now I can't throw it away like like an old pair of underwear after a bear attack? I think I should be able to wipe the hard drive ( Drives in my case....since my noggin is so Freegin Huuuge) clean and load up my own special dialect. But oh no!!! I'm stuck with this miserable, wretch-like language. Kinda like Dick Cheney and Nancy Pelosi on a desert island ...it's a recipe for cannibalism. Not that I would eat my own brain in order to eliminate my miniscule knowledge of English.....well, maybe if I was on an island with Nancy Pelosi. The only problem there is that, while I wouldn't be able to understand what she was saying, I would still be able to hear that irritating voice. It's like combining a chalk board, fingernails....and a bull horn. Only the Pelosi bullhorn is aimed at my throat and is stomping on it, shrieking decibel after shrieking decibel. Oh well, maybe I would be fortunate enough to get stuck on an island upon which I would stumble across a rusty coat-hanger. Bye bye eardrums. Considering the rate of trash and litter being dumped into the ocean, stumbling across a useful piece of trash on a deserted island really isn't that far fetched.....I AM stuck there with Pelosi after all. Who knows..maybe I'll happen upon a stash of canned SPAM and some trash bags. ...oh, and a Garfield radio. No..wait, nevermind.... yeah that'll work as long as it's solar and my giant planetoid for a head doesn't block the sun from the island and choke off the scant life that was still struggling to exist. It would be hard to charge the batteries for my little, plastic, singing Kitty-friend if there is no sunlight.Hmmmm, very Eeen-tur-res-teeng.
Oh....and I have a big noggin.
Oh....and I have a big noggin.
Tuesday, May 19, 2009
Broken
Lots of things break. Glass breaks. Legs break. Necks break....wait...I'm getting off track. Why was I thinking about breaking necks? Oh yeah! I was watching a member of the DNC talk about "free health care" for everyone....which kinda ties into my "broken" theme today (in more than one way). You see, if you have a broken neck you don't need health care unless you're still alive. If you're still alive then whoever broke your neck didn't do it right. Or maybe it was an accident in which case you didn't hit/twist it hard enough. If you're dead you don't need health care and don't have to worry about affording it.
Have you ever wondered about how this "desperate need" for health insurance has come about? For tens of thousands of years mankind has lived on this earth without the "need" for health insurance. In the last 40-50 years it's become a "necessity". It's not necessary if you're DEAD. Think about that and then contemplate the sudden influx of these "life saving" medications that, in cold hard reality, simply prolong the inevitable. Then look at the surging health care industry. See a connection? THEY'RE KEEPING YOU ALIVE SO YOU CAN BUY MORE MEDICINE AND PAY FOR THEIR CARE. It's a big scam. People were perfectly happy in the late 1800's without health insurance. They had their life expectancy and when it was time to die...they just died. Seems pretty simple to me. Now, I'd say that our overwhelming eagerness to buy into this scam stems from 2 reasons:
1: We're afraid to die and desperately clutch to any pitiful means which will prolong our life another year.
2: We bought into a lie. We're buying meds from the same health care industry that is there to care for us. However, how many people end up needing care due to side effects caused by medication? How many people get hospitalized while on the medication designed to keep them out of the hospital? They're bleeding us dry. Why? Look at answer number 1.
We're simply afraid to die. Buncha weenies. We'd be able to afford health insurance if we'd stop nursing at the tit of these blood suckers. Just imagine how affordable it would be if we just stopped paying for health insurance and let private doctors actually practice again. We turned health care into a money making scam and now we wonder why it's no longer afforable? Did we actually think we could have publicly traded health care companies without a rise in health care costs? Isn't the point of investing to make money? How do you make money investing in a health care company if they don't turn a profit? You see, they turned an industry that is supposed to be geared toward human compassion and turned it into a business. They formed pharmeceutical alliances, machine patents, and turned assisted care homes into freakin hotels....all in the name of stock value and investor profit. Now, I'm not saying that people in the health care industry shouldn't be well paid....but should we be able to take short positions on the open market on hospital stock? When does it end?
I'm contemplating just letting myself die. Yeah, that'll show them. They're not going to get a red cent out of me. When my time comes I'll just crawl out in the woods, like any self respecting Cape Buffalo or Spotted Northern Woodpecker, and die with my face in a pile of stinging nettles. My decomposing body won't cost the system one stinkin' penny.
I dont know where this came from. I just opened the blog and started writing and this came out.
I was actually going to mention that my armpits are sweaty but I decided not to. Oh well.
I have a big noggin.
Have you ever wondered about how this "desperate need" for health insurance has come about? For tens of thousands of years mankind has lived on this earth without the "need" for health insurance. In the last 40-50 years it's become a "necessity". It's not necessary if you're DEAD. Think about that and then contemplate the sudden influx of these "life saving" medications that, in cold hard reality, simply prolong the inevitable. Then look at the surging health care industry. See a connection? THEY'RE KEEPING YOU ALIVE SO YOU CAN BUY MORE MEDICINE AND PAY FOR THEIR CARE. It's a big scam. People were perfectly happy in the late 1800's without health insurance. They had their life expectancy and when it was time to die...they just died. Seems pretty simple to me. Now, I'd say that our overwhelming eagerness to buy into this scam stems from 2 reasons:
1: We're afraid to die and desperately clutch to any pitiful means which will prolong our life another year.
2: We bought into a lie. We're buying meds from the same health care industry that is there to care for us. However, how many people end up needing care due to side effects caused by medication? How many people get hospitalized while on the medication designed to keep them out of the hospital? They're bleeding us dry. Why? Look at answer number 1.
We're simply afraid to die. Buncha weenies. We'd be able to afford health insurance if we'd stop nursing at the tit of these blood suckers. Just imagine how affordable it would be if we just stopped paying for health insurance and let private doctors actually practice again. We turned health care into a money making scam and now we wonder why it's no longer afforable? Did we actually think we could have publicly traded health care companies without a rise in health care costs? Isn't the point of investing to make money? How do you make money investing in a health care company if they don't turn a profit? You see, they turned an industry that is supposed to be geared toward human compassion and turned it into a business. They formed pharmeceutical alliances, machine patents, and turned assisted care homes into freakin hotels....all in the name of stock value and investor profit. Now, I'm not saying that people in the health care industry shouldn't be well paid....but should we be able to take short positions on the open market on hospital stock? When does it end?
I'm contemplating just letting myself die. Yeah, that'll show them. They're not going to get a red cent out of me. When my time comes I'll just crawl out in the woods, like any self respecting Cape Buffalo or Spotted Northern Woodpecker, and die with my face in a pile of stinging nettles. My decomposing body won't cost the system one stinkin' penny.
I dont know where this came from. I just opened the blog and started writing and this came out.
I was actually going to mention that my armpits are sweaty but I decided not to. Oh well.
I have a big noggin.
Monday, May 18, 2009
My first blog
You'll have to bear with me...this is the first time I've done something like this. If you don't bear with me that's fine because I won't care anyway. Hmmmm.....what should I write about? Where is my stinkin' sandwich....oh there it is. Hold on...I have to go to the can..be right back.
Ahhh...I feel better now. Now where was I? Ah, yes, this is my first blog post as a madman. Well, my first one on this blog as I've responded to other people's blog posts and I've been told that my "thinker need a tinker" for quite a while now. That's neither here nor there. Hold on.....never mind....thought I saw a Tufted Titmouse outside. I have a Power Rangers "Mystic Force" ball that I'm playing with right now...as I'm typing. It even says "Vanquish Villains" on it which is kinda cool if you're into that kind of thing. If you're not....um.....congrats? What in the world am I trying to say? Oh yeah.....I better start a new paragragh or you might get a bit confused, if you're not.....hey, what's my tape measure doing out?
Ok. The jist of this whole dealio is that I'm just gonna post whatever pops into my head throughout the day and if you want to read it, fine. If not....I really don't blame you as I'm not important and this may be, at times, eerily similar to the railings of a young Hannibal Lector, Paul the Apostle, Dennis Miller, and Strawberry Shortcake all rolled into one freakishly hideous package. I'm going to try to type like I talk but that could be very meandering. I will NOT try to type like I think...as there would be a big blank page one day and then a whirlwind of gradeschoolish, hyperactive jibberish sprinkled with mind blowing honesty the next. Try to keep up....and if you're capable, tape it for me so I can figure myself out. It would be like my own little Doctor Phil session on DVD..only I'd have to stare at me for however long. No one would wish that on me...would you?
Anyway.....I have a big noggin.
Ahhh...I feel better now. Now where was I? Ah, yes, this is my first blog post as a madman. Well, my first one on this blog as I've responded to other people's blog posts and I've been told that my "thinker need a tinker" for quite a while now. That's neither here nor there. Hold on.....never mind....thought I saw a Tufted Titmouse outside. I have a Power Rangers "Mystic Force" ball that I'm playing with right now...as I'm typing. It even says "Vanquish Villains" on it which is kinda cool if you're into that kind of thing. If you're not....um.....congrats? What in the world am I trying to say? Oh yeah.....I better start a new paragragh or you might get a bit confused, if you're not.....hey, what's my tape measure doing out?
Ok. The jist of this whole dealio is that I'm just gonna post whatever pops into my head throughout the day and if you want to read it, fine. If not....I really don't blame you as I'm not important and this may be, at times, eerily similar to the railings of a young Hannibal Lector, Paul the Apostle, Dennis Miller, and Strawberry Shortcake all rolled into one freakishly hideous package. I'm going to try to type like I talk but that could be very meandering. I will NOT try to type like I think...as there would be a big blank page one day and then a whirlwind of gradeschoolish, hyperactive jibberish sprinkled with mind blowing honesty the next. Try to keep up....and if you're capable, tape it for me so I can figure myself out. It would be like my own little Doctor Phil session on DVD..only I'd have to stare at me for however long. No one would wish that on me...would you?
Anyway.....I have a big noggin.
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